In today’s culture, “self-care” has become a buzzword that often points to indulgence: mani-pedis, solo getaways, or spa days. While there’s nothing wrong with enjoying these things, we can sometimes start believing the subtle lie that self-care must come before everything else—or it doesn’t count. But the truth is, self-care isn’t about putting ourselves first. It’s about tending to ourselves so we can faithfully tend to what God has entrusted to us.
In her book “Small Changes for a Better Life,” Elizabeth George offers this wisdom:
“There is a distinction between selfishness and taking care of yourself. Selfishness is self-indulgence, self-serving, and self-focus, which hinders our service to God and others. Tending to yourself, however, enhances and strengthens your service to God and others.”
This distinction matters. True self-care is not selfish—it’s stewardship. When we care for ourselves in healthy, intentional ways, we show up stronger, more present, and more grounded in our relationships and responsibilities.
There are two extremes we need to avoid:
- Putting ourselves first, ahead of every responsibility and relationship. That’s not stewardship—it’s self-centeredness in disguise.
- Putting ourselves last, believing that being overextended is somehow virtuous. That kind of martyrdom may feel noble, but it often breeds resentment, exhaustion, and hidden pride.
Neither path honors God or brings peace.
What Real Self-Care Looks Like
Self-care isn’t just about escaping your life—it’s about sustaining it. It’s the margin that helps you avoid burnout and live with purpose. It doesn’t have to be elaborate. It can be:
- A quiet cup of coffee on the patio
- A hot shower while your spouse or helps out at home
- A walk around the block
- A few minutes reading Scripture or sitting in prayer
Small rhythms, not big events, are often what restore us most.
Creating a Sustainable Self-Care Routine
To integrate self-care into your life in a meaningful way, begin with your morning. A thoughtful morning routine becomes a template for your day, a steady pattern before the demands begin.
Here are a few guiding questions to help you create your personalized plan:
- When will you get up?
Choose a wake-up time that gives you enough space to move through your morning without chaos or rushing. - What will you eat?
Plan simple breakfasts you enjoy and keep ingredients on hand. This helps eliminate daily decision fatigue and supports wellness. - When will you exercise?
Whether it’s stretching, walking, or a full workout—write it down. Schedule it like an appointment. - How will you start your day spiritually?
As a Christ-follower, I know my day always goes better when I begin with God’s Word and prayer. Whether it’s 10 minutes in Scripture or 5 minutes of journaling, anchor your day in something soul-nourishing.
Write down your answers to these questions. Put them into your phone or planner and set reminders if needed. Then commit to trying this new rhythm for a week.
Once your morning routine becomes consistent, move on to your evening routine:
- When will you turn off screens?
- How will you wind down mentally?
- What helps you transition from “doing” to resting?
Share your plan with your spouse or household members. Let them know why it matters, so they can support and respect your time.
Self-care is about being equipped to live life well. Steward your energy and schedule with wisdom, not guilt. You don’t need to earn rest or justify it.
When you care for your body, mind and spirit with intention you’re honoring the God who created you. Start small, stay consistent, and remember: your well-being matters because your calling matters.
“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” —Ephesians 2:10
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