Feeling Tapped Out? How to Deal with Weariness

It’s been a few busy months for our family. I started up a small online business, and my husband is working to finish his master’s degree.  My Youngest is in the last year of homeschool and we are trying to make sure we have finished all that he needs to graduate in the spring.

While COVID has not hit our family in the same ways as others, after nine months my husband and I are feeling the strain: a lack of privacy, and freedom. Not really because of COVID, but because the house feels smaller now that my mom lives with us, and the Oldest has graduated from college and temporarily camping out upstairs in our extra living space.

When it was me, my husband, and the Youngest, life seemed so quiet. We had our routines. My son studies independently, so he doesn’t need my help as much anymore.

Now, it’s more difficult. Something always needs cleaning or fixing.  Mom needs help with certain activities, which always must be done on her schedule, not mine. My Oldest thinks that if he keeps to himself, he doesn’t have to pitch in to help anywhere. My husband has a demanding career and while finishing his master’s degree, his time is more limited.

Anxiety is increasingly creeping in every crevice. There doesn’t seem to be an end to the disruptions and discouragement.

Just lately, I told my husband that I found the perfect word to explain how I feel: weary.

This doesn’t necessarily mean I’m tired (although some days I feel more tired than others), it is the best word to describe the season that I’m currently struggling through.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary has the best definitions of my kind of “weary”:

Exhausted in strength, endurance, vigor, or freshness;
having one’s patience, tolerance, or pleasure exhausted.
Synonyms: burned-out, drained, jaded, tapped out.  

Tapped out.

I can’t seem to do it anymore. Peace and joy seem elusive.

Many self-help gurus promote changing your routine, doing self-care, and taking some things off your plate, but that isn’t really the answer to the weariness that I’m facing.

King Solomon experienced the same weariness and strain as the king of Israel. In fact, some of his writing in the book of Ecclesiastes can be downright depressing. The book begins with his musings of how life is futile, and how there is an emptiness in pleasure and possessions. You wonder why this book is even included in the Bible.

However, Solomon was considered the wisest man in the world, so there must be a reason his contemplations and ponderings are there for us to read today.

By chapter three, we read his thoughts about seasons.

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace.
What do people really get for all their hard work? I have seen the burden God has placed on us all.
Yet [emphasis mine] God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.  

When we experience hardships or successes, happiness, or grief, increase or loss – that is normal. And while we may groan under the weight of some burdens we currently have to bear, there is something else.

There is no burden without blessing, no hardship without promise. God has made everything beautiful for its own time, even if we cannot see what God is planning for us in the future.

The Apostle Paul experienced this too. He writes in Romans 8:28:  “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”  God can use anything in our lives for our benefit, or even someone else’s.

God’s promises give us hope. Jesus said: “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” (Matthew 11:28-29)

Things are hard right now. The only way that I get through the tough times is that I have hope in the promises that God has spoken through the generations. From King Solomon’s times through to Apostle Paul in a new millennium.  I have hope because I have seen what God has done for me in the past, and I am confident He will continue to do remarkable things for me in the future.  

So, we don’t give up. We keep doing the next right thing. We look for the blessings that God promises will come.  

Texas is finally experiencing lovely, cool fall weather. (Texas fall runs about two months later than most of the country!)  With temperatures in the upper 50s, I can wear my jeans, long-sleeved shirts, and Uggs. Christmas lights are going up in our neighborhood. My little online business is off to a slow but nice start. The Hubby is almost ready to start a three-week holiday break from college.

Seasons do change. Some seasons may feel much longer than others — like a Texas Summer — but they will change.